Guardian Angel
by songs in my pocket
Summary: Haley James has always had a guardian angel. OTH/SPN crossover.


It was like a recurring nightmare that just wouldn't stop, not matter how many times he woke up from his short nights. Shooting up in a sweaty blur, mumbling her name in his sleep, clenching his fists as his head would whip around, making sure there was nobody around. And then he'd be reminded she wasn't beside him anymore. That sweet shampoo scent of her hair that made him feel like he was back home everytime he managed to get a whiff of it, wasn't around to comfort him. Her bright smile didn't stand out in the crowd. Was this what he allowed Sam to save him for? Was this what he gave up Hell for? Hell would have been more bareable than having to live through Hell on Earth instead. Not that he'd ever admit that to Sam though. Instead of watching her strum her guitar singing show tunes while he should be focusing on doing research for the case at hand, he was stuck watching her motionless body lay in that hospital bed in the middle of the blindingly white room that made him go crazy with the beeping sounds from all the machines that were hooked up to his love. The only girl that he had ever allowed himself to love, to fall for, to be vulnerable around, was stuck in a hospital bed - paralyzed. Thanks to some son of a bitch who thought it'd be funny to pin the repercussions of sneaking around a loop hole of his deal on one of the only two people in the world that they knew meant something more to him.

Rubbing his eyes with the palm of his hands, he allowed the bright lights of the hospital room blind him for the few moments it took for them to adjust. He then focused on the blonde laying in the bed. Her head turned, and he noticed her forced smile. The only smile he ever seemed to see since the accident. Accident, what a stupid thing to call it, but it was the only thing he could without wanting to punch a hole through the wall. At least then the walls wouldn't be so bland. This room wasn't right for her. It wasn't right for his spunky girl who called him on all his bullshit. He stood up and took a seat on the usual chair that hadn't moved from where he had last placed it the night before, his hand reaching for the blonde's. "Mornin'." she mumbled. He kissed the back of her hand.

"Can I get you anything?" he questioned. Dean had been waiting on her hand and foot since she had been in the hospital; feeding her, brushing her hair, watching movies with her. Anything to try and make her better. To make her move again. She was such an independent person that he saw it on her face when she couldn't do something for herself - the disappointment, the frustration.

She shook her head - at least she could still use that motion. Her legs weren't in motion, and she couldn't clench her hands. He had to stay there - to protect her. Just like he had when he had made that deal. He had to bring her back. It was the only way he could keep on living.

"You sure? I can make a quick trip down to the cafeteria and get you that jello you like so much." he insisted, but he saw her shake her head once again, she moved her closed hand on top of his and as much as he would like to admit it reassured him like it used to - it didn't. Not without the second squeeze that she usually added and he'd be able to turn around and see her with that smile.

"Dean, I'm fine." she insisted.

"So, movie night tonight, am I right?" Dean changed the subject, having to look away from her gaze.

"Yeah. I'm thinking I'm in the mood for The Hot Chick." she told him. Dean had to make a face, but soon turned to her with a nod, agreeing. "Dean! I'm kidding. You're supposed to tell me there's no way in hell you're watching that - no matter how hot I am." a frown fell upon her lips. Her gorgeous lips that felt like velvet upon his own. Still, he said nothing. He knew it made her frustrated when he agreed with everything she wanted to do - everything she said. He was just too afraid to argue with her. Scared that it might be the last words he ever would speak to her. Or maybe it was just because he felt guilty.

"Fine. Don't say anything." she added shortly after with a huff. Crossing her arms - or, trying to, before giving up and flinging them to both sides of her as she scrunched up her forehead.

Lucky for the couple, the silence was soon broken as a third joined them in the room. "Miss Haley James, I have a special gift for you!" a voice exclaimed. Haley quirked an eyebrow, but still said nothing. "Okay, so I was thinking how boring this place was, and decided - what better gift to give you than my gift of interior design talent!" the brunette waved at someone, motioning for them to come in. Of course, she should have known it'd be the blonde haired boy that she called her best friend that trailed behind her, carrying several boxes toppled on top of one another.

"Hey Hales."

"Hey Lucas." she greeted with a small laugh slipping from her lips.

"Dean." Lucas nodded, Dean nodded back. However, the boy with the dark jacket stayed in his own world, keeping his eyes on Haley.

"Oh! Wait, Tutor Girl, I brought you another gift. An original Brooke Davis robe - and you'll be happy to know it's not slutty." she told the blonde, pulling out a long purple housecoat from the top box that had been placed with all the others on one of the extra chairs in the room. "I figured you were getting tired of walking around with a hospital gown that showed off your ass." The blonde smiled in appreciation, before she watched her ex-roommate get to work, scurrying around the room. She seemed to be measuring and remeasuring things before writing down numbers on a notepad she had brought, and Haley had to look away to keep herself from getting too dizzy.

"Where's Peyton?" she asked her best friend, not having seen her fellow music junkie friend since about two weeks ago when it was announced she might not walk again; thanks to that stupid bullet that had grazed her spinal cord.

"Oh, she's busy getting together some things for a school project or something. She sends her wishes, though." he nodded, as though he were apologizing for his girlfriend's absence. But Haley understood. Peyton Sawyer wasn't a fan of hospitals. Most importantly, she wasn't a fan of accidents that hurt her friends, or risked her losing more people in her life.

"Well, tell her to get her skinny butt down here 'cause I'm dying to hear some of her new music she recommends. All Dean brings in is his Metallica and AC/PC."

"AC/DC Hales!" Dean was quick to correct her.

"Oh, sorry. AC/DC. It's all the same to me. Men screaming."

Lucas laughed, "I'll be sure to tell her you want a mixed tape."

"Thank you."

There was a few seconds of silence before a voice quipped, "What's wrong with Metallica?"

* * *

Haley and Dean had been curled up in her hospital bed (as much as two people can be curled up in such a small bed - all the while making sure he wouldn't hurt her) watching a movie on the portable DVD player that her parents had brought by after it became known that she'd be in there for a while. The movie that had been chosen was The Notebook - one of Haley's favorites. Dean could probably act out both parts by now (not that he ever would admit that to anyone). But, as the rain scene that Haley loved so much came on, he turned down to find the blonde fast asleep. With swift and quiet movements, he turned off the DVD, moved ever so slightly so he could get up without waking her up and pulled up the blanket over her body.

Leaning over, his lips found her forehead before he whispered a "Good night," and left the hospital room, looking to find a safe place to call Sam and see where he was. He had been blaming himself more than Dean liked to take into account. Sam felt since it was him that insisted on saving his brother, it was his fault that Haley was in the position she was in. Those Winchester brothers really needed to stop blaming everything on themselves.

* * *

After going to the hotel the boys were staying in while they were in Tree Hill, Dean had fallen asleep in a proper bed and Sam had managed to force him to shower and change his clothes. They had spoken a few times about what or who could have decided to put gun in the face of such an innocent girl such as Haley James, but they always ended up at the same place - nowhere. No leads. Sam promised to keep looking, but was always hesitant to tell his brother about any leads. Afraid he'd do something stupid - again.

"Alright, I'm heading back to the hospital." Dean spoke, emerging from the washroom in fresh clothes. "You coming or not?"

"I'm gonna keep looking." The two boys exchanged glances. Both that said 'I wish you'd stop blaming yourself already,' before Dean left the room and Sam went back to typing away on his laptop.

* * *

"The prodigal Dean Winchester returns!" Haley exclaimed with a smile, "And wha-?! Am I dreaming, did you actually decide to shower and change today?" she quirked an eyebrow with a smirk - one that wasn't forced.

Haley's energy came and went. Sometimes it went more than it came. But when it came, Dean was more than happy to go back to pretending like things were okay - as hard as it was for him to do so while watching a seventeen year old girl lay in a bed immobile from the waist down. "Ha-ha. Very funny." he responded, walking into the hospital room before darting his eyes around. "What the hell ... Is Brooke some kind of little fairy princess with some kind of elves that work in the dark of night?"

"Creepy, right? I do think she had Lucas, and probably roped Karen into it somehow." she laughed softly. Pictures were strewn around the room, some posted on big posters that had 'get well' or 'we miss you' on them. The windows even had new drapes. Haley was pretty sure if Brooke had been allowed, she would have painted the walls.

A knock sounded on the doorframe as Dean bent down and kissed Haley lightly. "I can come back." a soft, hesitant voice reminded them of her presence.

Haley's smile returned to her lips as she saw the curly blonde at the doorway, who was holding onto her laptop under one arm and a CD with the other. "No, no, no. Come in, Peyton."

"I'm gonna go grab some coffee. Drink anyone?"

"I'll have one of those mocha frappucino things." Haley answered while Peyton shook her head, and Dean disappeared.

"Is this a sign that my request is being filled?" the blonde then asked the other, turning her attention back to her new visitor.

"Lucas told me about you not wanting to listen to Dean's music anymore. Soo, ta-dah!" Peyton presented the CD all model-esque like to the hospital patient. She was about to hand it to her until she remembered that she had no idea how Haley would hold onto it. "Uhm, I'll just ... Put it ..." the curly blonde looked around, "Here." she set it down on the table beside her and forced a smile.

"Peyton." Haley stated quietly, "You don't have to be so weird around me. It's not like I've lost an arm or something." she told her friend. Still, she stayed quiet.

"I just ... I hate hospitals." she broke the silence a few minutes later.

"I know, but look around. Does it look like a hospital room anymore?" she quirked an eyebrow with a small smile.

"It actually kinda looks like Brooke's bedroom." Peyton laughed softly.

"Scary thought." Haley quickly joked. "Soo, lets hear some of that music."

"Well, I've been meaning to show you this - " she popped open her laptop and opened up iTunes. "Okay, so, remember that song you recorded for that benefit album?"

"Yeah..."

"I kinda finished it without you." Peyton said with a slight smile, hoping Haley wasn't too mad. "The vocals were all done, and I was able to steal the studio for a bit and finish it. Want to hear it?"

"Peytonn ..." Haley whined, she hated hearing herself. She was always too critical of herself.

"Haley, come on. I promise, it's good. It's _really _good."

"Fine." Peyton jumped a little in her seat at her accomplishment before double clicking on the song titled 'Halo' by the artist 'Haley James' before turning up the volume a little bit so they both could hear it clearly.

* * *

_I never promised you a ray of light  
I never promised there'd be sunshine every day  
I'll give you everything I have  
The good, the bad_

"I can't, okay. It's just not going to happen." Haley exclaimed, frustratedly as she threw the pencil onto the table. Dean frowned, as the Doctor continued to press Haley on.

"Haley, if you don't keep trying, of course it won't happen." her Doctor said, picking the pencil back up and putting it in front of Haley properly.

"If I keep trying, it's just gonna get more depressing and frustrating." the blonde corrected the Doctor, before sighing and trying once more. Concentrating, her hand hovered above the pencil, but her fingers didn't bend. Her hand shook, but the fingers never bent. She never wrapped her hand around the pencil, and the more she tried, the more it hurt. The more she tried, the more the anger boiled in Dean.

"Look, she's done for the day." Dean erupted after a few more times, and a few more times Haley gave up. He didn't enjoy the Haley James that just gave up. She was supposed to be the persistent one. Rolling the table away from Haley, he eyed the Doctor seriously so she'd get the point that there would be no convincing him otherwise that day.

"Fine. Same time tomorrow." she sent that same glare Dean's way before disappearing.

"Dean, you didn't have to do that."

"What are you talking about?"

"Stop fighting my battles. I'll tell _my_ doctor when _I'm_ done. It's not your job to take care of me!"

"Yes it is, Haley."

"What makes you think that?"

"It's my fault your in here to begin with."

"So, what? You taking care of me is some kind of community service for putting me in here!? Please! Stop feeling sorry for yourself, Dean." Haley threw her hands in the air to add to the dramatic effect, glad she still could do that by herself.

"Oh, so what now? I'm not allowed to help you? Is that it? I'm not allowed to be here and help you while you can't even get yourself out of bed?!"

"I can! ... At least I could try if you weren't around. You make me feel like I can't do anything at all."

"Well, sorry for being a burden." he spat at her, rolling his eyes at her behavior. What was this, their seven hundredth fight about how long he was spending in the hospital with her?

_Why do you put me on a pedestal?  
I'm so up high that I can't see the ground below  
So help me down you've got it wrong  
I don't belong there_

* * *

"So, this is who did it?" he asked his little brother, pointing at the screen that had a Virginia license up on the screen.

"I'm pretty sure, yes." Sam answered, writing down the address, knowing it would be his brother's next request.

"Okay, lets go."

"Wait - what?" he shot his gaze to his brother, shutting his laptop.

"What, are you deaf? Lets go."

"We can't just leave, Dean." But, his brother was already grabbing his bag from one side of his bed.

"Sammy, this guy shot Haley. Put her in critical care and paralyzed her. If you think I'm just gonna sit back and wait for him to disappear you're seriously deranged."

"No, it's just. Here. Now. Haley's still in the hospital." Sam hesitated, watching his brother gather up the rest of his things and head towards the door of the room.

"Well I'm going, we can pay a quick visit to the hospital and we'll be back in a few days."

"Dean."

"Come on." And with that, Dean Winchester left his younger brother in the hotel room to pick up his things before hopping into his Impala after throwing his things into the back.

* * *

_One thing is clear  
I wear a halo  
I wear a halo when you look at me  
But standing from here  
You wouldn't say so  
You wouldn't say so if you were me  
And I, I just want to love you  
Oh I, I just want to love you_

_I always said that I would make mistakes  
I'm only human and that's my saving grace  
I'll fall as hard as I try  
So don't be blinded  
See me as I really am  
I have flaws and sometimes I even sin  
So pull me from that pedestal  
I don't belong there _

"So, you have to go 'cause Sam ran out of his special soap?" Haley cocked an eyebrow at Dean, before turning her attention to Sam. "Don't you two lie to me."

"No, it's true. It keeps him from ... Smelling like a rodent." Dean hesitated, tossing a glance Sam's way and finding a disgusted gaze being shot his way.

"Great ... I'll be sure to tell Peyton that." Haley nodded sarcastically. "Sam, mind giving us a moment?"

"Yeah, sure. And if you could - just, not tell Peyton ... I don't think she'll ever come near me again."

Haley watched Sam leave before turning and smacking Dean with the back of her hand - the best she could, anyway. "Where the hell are you going? And tell me the truth."

"Fine. Truth is, there's this Monster Truck Rally thing going on and I have to go see it." Dean forced a sly smile, one that he knew Haley loved.

"No, that's not going to work." It took only a few more moments for her to put the puzzle pieces together. "You're going to find the guy who shot me, aren't you?" he didn't answer. "Aren't you!?"

"Fine. Yes. I can't risk him running away."

"Dean! What did I tell you?" Haley asked him, looking at him seriously. Dean had to look away.

"Do you want the direct quote or ..."

"I'm serious!"

"Haley, you don't get it. I have to. He hurt you."

"No, you don't." Haley interrupted him, "You don't think I'd love to hurt the guy who did this to me? I'd love to, but I won't. 'Cause I'm not a dumbass. And please, don't tell me you're going to go back to being one again."

"Hey!"

"I'm serious, Dean. You better not do some stupid shit like when you sold your soul for mine."

"I've never heard your curse so seriously before." Dean smirked, "It's kind of a turn on." He was about to kiss her, before he backed up from the glare he was receiving. "Haley, I have to make sure he gets what's coming to him."

"No, Dean! No. Just - stop. You have to stop!" she exclaimed, "Look at me! Okay? It's done, nothing you do now will change anything, except make things worse. You have to stop risking your life for me. You have to stop making dumb choices. It's stupid, and ridiculous, and just - stupid!" the blonde blinked away the stinging sensation that threatened to allow the tears to fall.

He looked to the floor, shuffling his feet slightly before looking back at her - finally being serious. "I can't ... I can't just stand around and watch you get hurt."

"And what about me?" she questioned quietly, receiving a curious glance in return, "What about me? Huh?" she repeated. "How am I supposed to feel if you get hurt again? Or worse - how am I supposed to feel if you die? Dean, I've already almost lost you once, I can't do that again. The only reason I'm still here is because of you. Please - just don't."

"Is this what you think I want?" she asked after a few moments had passed. "Do you think the way to fix this is to kill the guy? You think they don't expect you to do exactly that? When have I ever thought that killing someone is the best repracussion."

Silence engulfed them once more, before, once more, Haley spoke. "Promise me, Dean. Promise me you won't do anything stupid."

"I can't -" he hesitated, turning to head towards the door. He stopped, however, for one last look back at the girl in the hospital bed. She wasn't Haley. She was persistent like Haley. But, she wasn't his Haley. Not the old one. She didn't have that spark, she didn't chase after him, she wouldn't force herself to come with him and Sam on their little 'road trips' when she didn't want him to go. When she wanted to keep an eye on him, she wouldn't follow him. No, this wasn't Haley. Haley James would follow him if he left. "That's not who I am."

"Dean, if you go to wherever you were planning on going to find him - " she had to bite her tongue and rethink what she was about to say, "Don't come back."

And with that, without another word, Dean left the room. And all Haley could do was stare at the shut door in front of her.

_One thing is clear  
I wear a halo  
I wear a halo when you look at me  
But standing from here  
You wouldn't say so  
You wouldn't say so if you were me  
And I, I just want to love you  
Oh I, I just want to love you_

_Like to think that you know me  
But in your eyes  
I am something above me  
That's only in your mind  
Only in your mind_

And that day was the last time Haley James ever saw Dean Winchester. But don't go around getting the wrong idea, he watched over her. Always. There was never a day that she didn't regret her words. That she didn't regret her actions. As she got the feeling back in her hands, and was labelled as 'one of the lucky ones' when she could finally grasp something. However, she never walked again. She sang her music for small crowds, but it never felt the same. There was always a void. There was always that feeling that people stared at her and thought she was a freak. Thought she was weird. She was just the girl in a wheel chair.

Dean Winchester watched her from afar. He lost her after her high school graduation for a few months, but found her again at Stanford University - following her dream. He, however, kept on going. His brother went back to school, while he kept living from town to town, and hunting demons. Despite his brother's protests, Dean wasn't going to drag him down with him. It was his destiny. He was meant to live the rest of his life alone. Meant to save others from the things that go bump in the night. All the while, hiding his own void that Haley James had left. He had walked away, and he had to live with that. And if you ever wanted to know - he did find the guy that shot Haley James and put her in a wheelchair, and he did put him where he belonged; in his own wheelchair.

He watched Haley graduate from University, get married to some guy who he didn't make it his duty to figure out who. He watched them adopt children, and watched those children grow up. He watched them until he died, peacefully in his sleep, dreaming of Haley James, who followed suite just a few days later. But, Dean Winchester will always be known as Haley's guardian angel. Haley James-Scott's guardian angel. But, maybe now he's just the guy that she'll look after.

_I wear a, I wear a, I wear a Halo_

__

One thing is clear  
I wear a halo  
I wear a halo when you look at me  
But standing from here  
You wouldn't say so  
You wouldn't say so if you were me  
And I, I just want to love you  
Oh I, I just want to love you

_(I just wanna love you)  
Heya Hey Hey Hey…Hey Hey Halo  
Heya Hey Hey Hey…Hey Hey Halo  
Heya Hey Hey Hey…Hey Hey Halo  
Heya Hey Hey Hey…Hey Hey Halo_

After all, true love stories never end.


End file.
